Dating people in prison
' I'm falling in love.' ' I was blinded by love.' ' I felt like I was falling off a cliff.' And that was the initial reaction. ' All these dramatic, super dramatic, melodramatic things. You never know if they’ll let you into the prison or they’re on lockdown or what’s going to happen.
That high, that capital ' R' romantic love was kept up during the course of the relationship because the men were in prison, because they could not have a normal life with them. And of course, visiting someone in a prison where you’re surrounded by razor wire and high brick walls and mean-looking guards makes your relationship almost like Cinderella and the prince—everybody’s out to get you. ATTN: Did these women feel guilty that they were in a relationship with someone who has committed a terrible crime?
People looking to form a relationship with a prisoner can pursue profiles and contact anyone they’re interested in. While most of the websites feature both male and female inmates, it seems that it is mostly geared towards women looking for male prisoners.
Nobody said, ' Oh, I forgot to pick up the laundry.' Nobody said, ' You take care of the kids tonight, I’m tired.' It was none of the normal give and take of a marriage or a live in companion relationship. And afterward she said, ' You know he wasn't really guilty and I don't know why I convicted him.' They find ways to excuse the murder.
It's the kind of mad, passionate love that makes you lose your appetite, that makes you want to dance and sing.
When you first meet someone and you're high as a kite on that person—they all used that language. So having a relationship with a man in prison like that for murder is almost like reading a romance novel where you never knows what’s going to happen next.
ATTN: Were there any commonalities you found with the women who were attracted to men in prison? You can decide whether to accept his collect phone calls. There were women who are married, women who were single, women with children, women who didn’t have children, all different kinds of women.
Isenberg: The real crux of the whole thing is that these are all women who are damaged. So you’re always in a state of control because you’re the one who’s on the outside. So in a way, even though cons are very manipulative—that’s why we call them con men and they are manipulative with the women—it’s still up to the woman to decide how far she wants to go and she knows she can't be hurt. The only thing they had in common, which I did notice as a common factor, was that there were a lot of Catholic women.